The Prince's Diary
by TheDailyKnight
Summary: Merthur, Canon-era, AU. When Merlin arrives in Camelot, Prince Arthur finds that he has to keep a diary in order to keep his addled thoughts in order. This is that diary which he never intended anybody to read. All characters belong to their relevant creators and no offense or infringement is intended. I am just playing with them.


**1****st**** January**

Dear God, why am I doing this? I have never felt like such a girl in all my life! Me! A Prince, heir to a Kingdom and leader of the King's Knights is writing down his most personal thoughts in a diary. It is lucky that my handwriting is so poor – nobody except me will ever be able to read this. This, so Gaius tells me, is a sign of intelligence. I don't know if he was being flippant or not but I reason it must be true as I am not stupid and my handwriting is abysmal.

If I am to keep this diary, I must be logical, for that is its purpose – to help me get my mind straight again after _his_ arrival.

Anyway, yes, doing it properly... Dear Diary. My name is Prince Arthur Pendragon and I am... no, that sounds like something a child would write (plus I don't like disclosing my age to anybody). It's hardly the right tone for the dashing young heir to the throne that I am.

Oh, for God's sake, I give up! This is too girly!

**1****st**** January – Later**

_He_ has forced me back here again. Gaius' new apprentice. The gawky one with the mop of black hair and limbs that sprawl at all angles. I want to know why he keeps on screwing with my head, damn it! Take this afternoon. I was quite happily sitting behind my desk, reading my father's treaties (all right – maybe not happily – but I was doing it) when in he trots with some medicine from Gaius. The man doesn't even _knock_! I looked up at him and my mind went "nying". Seriously – that's what it sounds like when all of my previously coherent thoughts crash into one another and pile up. And, it seems, _nobody_ can cause a pile up of my thoughts like this _Merlin_ can.

And, do you know what he said to me as he stood there having wrecked my carefully arranged thoughts and shuffling his feet? No? He said, "Here's the lotion to remove your lower growth, Sire."

Honestly, I almost choked! And he said it _without closing the door first_! I swear I heard Morgana chuckle next door. Well, of course, snatching it from him and throwing him bodily out of the room was all I could do to preserve my dignity. I mean, _really_! Some people have no subtlety...

I am going to bed now and in the morning I shall try to rebuild what little dignity I have remaining. I don't know how I am going to face my sister at breakfast.

Goodnight.

**2****nd**** January – Before Midday**

He _and_ she are impossible! I arrive at breakfast and what do I find? Merlin fluffing up two cushions on the seat of my chair and Morgana grinning her face off. Now, I'm not saying that it's not nice of him to think of my pain as the hair removal can be a bit rough on the royal bottom, but so_ many_ cushions _in front of Morgana_? Really? That's like waving a red rag to a bull.

Well, that was it. Morgana spent all of breakfast making comments about how I needed to wear my softest trousers and sit on only the coolest surfaces. I couldn't even help myself to the buns without her commenting.

But do you know what really annoyed me? When I spilled some soup on my shirt, Merlin leapt forward to clean it up and knocked the rest of the bowl onto the floor. Naturally, being the kind, caring Prince that I am, I turned to make sure he was alright only to find myself staring at his bottom as he bent over to clean up the mess.

Well, it was a shock... I couldn't stop staring and who can blame me? I had just had the biggest surprise of the year so far. One moment hot soup on the floor which made me jump, the next I am face-to-face with _that thing_.

Now I can't even ask for a roll from Merlin to go with my meal for fear of choking Morgana... Actually, perhaps that's what I shall do. Her knowing smirks across the table are becoming just _too_ irritating.

At least I have Mithian's visit this evening to look forward to...

**2****nd**** January – Late Evening**

I don't believe it! How could this have happened? This is officially the worst day of my entire life! Mithian was meant to be entertaining us at court this evening. So, what do I do? I ask my makeover lady, Sarah, at our regular weekly meeting to make me look especially handsome for the occasion. Well, she worked her magic as she always does, and when I stepped into that hall, I swear all heads turned to me (even the men's, which I'm still glowing about). My hair shone, my skin was flawless and even my bottom was smooth (tender, but smooth). I have to hand it to Sarah – if there's a hair out of place (the lotion still leaves the stubborn ones largely intact), she'll find it and destroy it with her Wax Of Doom. She's good – my screams as the hair was being ripped from my chest and back didn't even get through the door of my chambers. That pillow of hers which I have to bite into really muffles the noise – it works just like magic.

Anyway, Mithian started to sing and I... I almost can't write it. It's too embarrassing really, but _I fell asleep_. In front of the best singer in the country at a special rendition! My cheeks are still glowing.

But the weird thing was that when I woke up I was covered – and I do mean _covered_ - in cobwebs. I mean, for God's sake! One cobweb is hard enough to get out of my hair, but do you know how much time I needed to spend getting rid of them all? My weekly makeover, completely destroyed! I shall never live it down.

Mithian had gone and in her place was the mother of a sorcerer my father had executed a few days earlier. (I forgot to write that in here earlier. Executions for sorcery are just too common these days.) And she threw a dagger at me. Of all the nerve! I know I was wearing a red cloak but seriously, the blood would have made for the most _horrendous_ clash of shades.

Alright, I'm being flippant, I know. I'm just trying to put off telling you the most embarrassing bit of all. Merlin saved me.

Yes, you read it right. _Merlin_ saved me by throwing me to the floor. I don't know what was worse – him saving my life (which, by the way, is right up there on my five-most-embarrassing-things-to-ever-happen-to-me scale, right above running naked through the town square for a bet and below not catching anything while hunting with the knights), or finding him straddling my hips in front of the entire Court. (I don't think anybody except Morgana noticed – and that is _quite_ bad enough.)

Well, a hot-blooded Prince like myself has urges, as Merlin quickly and unexpectedly found out. His fidgeting did not help matters and once I had thrown him off I was _exceptionally_ glad that I was still wearing a long robe. I don't know where I would have been able to look if I hadn't been able to hide it.

But, just to complete my humiliation, my father saw what had happened and decided to reward him. So _Merlin is now my manservant_.

_Disaster and damnation_! How am I ever going to get anything done now?

I shall go to bed and sleep on it (see what I did there?). I'm sure a solution will present itself.

If this is what my life is like as a Prince, I hate to think what it will be like as a King.

Goodnight.

**3****rd**** January – Obscenely Early (Seriously – The larks are still asleep)**

The idiot has not got a clue! Not one iota of sense exists between those bat-like ears of his! If he had a brain, he would be dangerous! Dawn is breaking outside, and I have already had my day ruined. No, not ruined; my life is now completely destroyed. Break out the funeral procession, I no longer wish to live like this.

He mixed up my cosmetics. Oh, I can live with the herbal infusions smelling a little stronger than usual, but when I reached for my luscious body-scrub and proceeded to scrub _down there_, do you know what I found? Hair dye! Ginger hair dye! Now I am as open-minded as the next Prince, but ginger hair dye? On my pubes? _Who chooses that?_ I am now stuck looking like a carrot down there for at least a month. Heaven knows how long it will take to go fully blond again, but I will make Merlin's life hell every day until it does.

Now I am going to find him and make him explain how this could have happened!

**3****rd**** January – Evening**

Merlin is in the stocks for laughing at blatantly unfunny situations. He thinks that me with ginger pubic hair is _hilarious_. So does Gwen. He couldn't keep his mouth shut about anything important if he tried!

Now I am the laughing stock of the castle. Well, amongst the two other people who know anyway, but that is not the point! Gwen has been sworn to secrecy. I want it going no further!

**4****th**** January - Morning**

I will kill him, slowly, with a hot poker. He served me toast and marmalade _with strands in_ at breakfast with such a smirk that the whole world could not fail to notice there is something wrong. Gwen looked amused as she was serving Morgana, who later presented me with a bright orange fox skin. Aarrggh! What did I do to deserve this?

Right, I am going hunting. I need to shoot something. Fast. If no prey presents itself, I shall declare open season on manservants.

**4****th**** January – Early Afternoon**

I shot nothing and Merlin is surprisingly quick on his feet for being such a lazy person. He dodged every sword blow I aimed at him. Let me back up, for that made no sense even to me. What I _meant_ was we returned from hunting early. The knights spotted a ginger tom on the way out of the castle and kept on making mewing sounds every time I made to catch something. So, I decided that Merlin would be my new target practice and returned to the castle training field.

Once he'd been suitably equipped with a shield, I sought to show him what knights making catty remarks at me which were _his fault_ makes me do. I think he got the message. The thing is, I still don't understand how he became so nimble considering that he does his duties so slowly. I could have sworn there was something in his eyes just before he sidestepped, but I could just be imagining that.

It's not as if he's a sorcerer, is it? No, my aim was just off. Anyway, I think he's got the message now. I hope so. Gaius presented me with a bottle of blond hair dye a few hours after Merlin left me, so I feel that he has indeed learned his lesson and is trying to make amends. I shall try it later and see if it works.

**4****th**** January – Late**

That walking buffoon! That gawky git! How can it be that he has such a smart head on him? The harder I dish it out, the more he comes back for! Honestly, is there _nothing_ that he can't embarrass me with?

Ok, just chill, Prince A. You've got this. You can write it. After all, it's not like anybody will ever get to _read_ it, is it? This is your therapy. Remember that.

*Takes a deep breath*.

The dye worked. That's the good news. I am back to looking like golden straw down there again rather than a lurid sunrise.

Merlin knows it too. I wish he would damned well _knock_! Alright, he didn't see it directly as I got out of the bath, but he spotted it reflected in the mirror. I had covered the glass with a drying cloth before I stepped in _and he picked it up ready to wrap me in it_. I don't think he's realised that being my manservant does not mean that he has to do literally _everything_ for me. Some privacy for the airing of the crown jewels would be nice!

And do you know what he said as I stood frozen on the spot, searching for something to hit him with? No? I'll tell you. He told me the shade was wrong! That's right – he made personal comments about the state of my pubes. Frankly, it's a bit rich. Apparently they don't match my hair perfectly.

When I told him that his probably didn't match his hair at all, he pulled out a clump to prove me wrong! The _bitch_! How am I meant to better that as a comeback? Well, I perfected a way. Oh yes. I passed a new law on the spot to say that manservants are not allowed pubic hair. Right now, my stylist is removing it for him.

Hah! We'll see how he likes that. I'm off to bed now. It's been a long and trying day.

**5****th**** January – Lunch Time**

Fuck it! Up the arse! Dry! Of all the things to come up in council, an increased bill from my stylist topped the agenda. I have just spent half an hour explaining to the senior courtiers and Father why there has been an overnight glut in requests for pubic waxing from their manservants. I have never been so...

Alright, just breathe. I'm not in deep shit unless it catches on with the knights... I shall swear the manservants to silence and pick up the bill for their bare balls from my personal account. I can't believe that I am paying to give them all naked nads, but that at least can be written off as a hygiene allowance. It doesn't have to go down in the record as what it is.

Anyway, the trend will probably wear off after the first snows.

**6****th**** January – Late Evening**

It is officially terrible! Awful! Vile! I don't know how to describe it. Today was the day "The Arthurian" was invented.

Normally I would be flattered, but word has got around that naked nads have improved the love lives of several of our manservants and now the wives of the knights have heard. My dear stylist has been putting up posters advertising the exact procedure all over town and claiming that it will rescue love lives which should rightly have been tossed overboard from the Ark to put them out of their misery.

Father says he is for once relieved that he is no longer married! Oh, God, the thought of sharing a pube-trim-style with Father is just... excuse me, I need to vomit.

The very worst of it though, is that it has my name on the style. "Arthurian" now means "egg-smooth party fruits". Can you _imagine_ the problems this is going to cause my reign?

And now, obviously, I have to have it done too. I cannot be seen to be behind with a fashion. I have booked my stylist for tonight to get it over with. I shall _murder_ that manservant when I see him. Or present him with the bill from my knights. I am sure that it will be huge. Some of them have cultivated _forests_ down there. One, whose owner I shall not name here, might even have its own weather system. Eeewwwww...

**7****th**** January – Early Morning**

Finally! I have wiped the smugness off of my manservant's smugly smug face! He didn't know where to look when I showed off my latest style to him. A blond, crown-shaped trim down there is, I have to admit, a bit of overkill, but it was worth it to see the dumbstruck look on his face. I don't think he'll be commenting for a while. He seems quite stunned. I have ordered him to muck out the stables. All that fresh straw will keep the image clear in his mind for most of the day.

**7****th**** January – Midday**

I have just put Merlin in the stocks for abusing himself in the stables. Yes, you read that correctly. He cleaned it, laid out new straw and then, apparently, lay down to _pass some time_. It seems that his climax caused a horse to bolt, tear through the town destroying several market stalls as it went, and Merlin was found with his breeches up but very definitely stained and considerably bulged. It didn't take a genius to put it all together.

Thankfully, nobody was hurt. Merlin is very red-cheeked and doesn't quite know what to say. That nobody was hurt was why I put him in the stocks instead of the dungeons. That'll be yet another bill aimed at me then, this time for damage repair. How much is this man going to end up costing me?

Still, I can't say that I blame him. Who would not pass up the opportunity to crack one off if they needed to and there was nobody around? I know I have been caught out that way many times. The problem with Merlin is a lack of discretion (and not having the get-out card of being the King's son, so I can jolly well jerk where I please! (Only joking)).

Anyway, the thought of it is somewhat amusing... It's put a grin on my face to have seen his expression when he was hauled before me.

Excuse me, but I need to shake a rat out of the bag before dinner. I must be calm for when I go and release him.

'Bye for now.

**7****th**** January – Just before bed**

Well, now I'm... I don't know how I am, actually. Merlin blamed his escapade on me. He told me when I released him that if I hadn't shown him my crown he would not have ended up in that situation.

Umm... Yes? How does a Prince handle that?

Not handle... no, definitely not handle. Handle is certainly the wrong word! Manage? No... Ride out the st- certainly not! Deal wi- it gets worse! Can I not find a turn of phrase which does not involve a reference to my manservant's cock?

Bollocks to it, I can't be bothered! How should I handle it? (Nobody will read this anyway.)

Well, it's tricky, to say the least. Merlin had a bulge when I let him out and he started accusing, you see. I tried to ignore it and he seemed to deny it existed, but it bobbed there for the entire world to see whilst he wittered on about my crown. I think it has something to do with his rough trousers and bare balls, to be honest.

What have I got myself into? Thank Heaven that I had de-stressed myself beforehand, else Lord only knows what reaction he would have been met with. For me, that would have been a huge problem.

I shall sleep on it and see what the morning brings. Hopefully things will be clearer by then...

**8****th**** January – Early Morning**

Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no! No, no, no, no, no! Yes? I don't know!

Merlin caught me stroking the stoat this morning! Doesn't he ever _knock_?

That was bad enough, but _I didn't stop_! I don't know what came over me. He was looking at me and I remembered yesterday with him in the stables and I just _didn't stop_!

Help me! I have no idea which way up is any more. I can't stand the guy, but with those eyes... fuck, I don't know what to _do_!

He was at least discreet enough to look away whilst I cleaned myself up afterwards, but... well, it was sort of _late_ to become modest really, wouldn't you agree?

Oh, and breakfast was sausages, eggs and bacon. I didn't ask him for the roll he'd forgotten. I hardly dared to risk it. He seemed too breathless and numbed to process any instructions. I would probably have ended up with the flower vase or something. I don't know. Breakfast was silent as he cleaned up... including my used rag. How embarrassing!

I mean, it's not unheard of for Royalty to embark on casual flings with their manservants, but I never thought I was the sort for that kind of thing. Hot blooded, check. Handsome, check. Muscular, you bet. Single? Sadly. Manservant dallier? I don't know.

I can't fathom what Merlin thought. He didn't move, but that could have been shock. But his eyes... I don't know if they were indifferent, stunned or whether he was memorising the scene hard so that he could play it back to himself later. Oh, God, my head!

Well, if he does, he does, I suppose. He already seemed excited about my crown, so at least it might give him a few hours of pleasure if he chooses to use it. It's out of my control now, that's for sure. I may be able to force him to keep silent, but that won't change the fact that it has happened.

Perhaps I should talk to him later about it... If I don't, it will become even more awkward than it is already. I just want to make sure I haven't traumatised him. Plus I can do without an awkward relationship with my manservant. Bad I can handle, good is great, but awkward is just... it creates tenseness and I just don't need that right now. At least I can apologise. I had him in the stocks for less, after all. I don't know what the penalty is for a commoner watching his Prince unload his woes, but you can be sure that if Father finds out, it will be harsh.

I'm off to find him now, before this can escalate. Wish me luck.

**8****th**** January – Bed Time**

I write this as I lay on my bed, puzzled. I have a pretty penis, did you know that? I didn't even know that a penis _could_ be considered pretty until Merlin blurted it out at me as I was leaving his room after giving him some new orders. Apparently it's the way it curves slightly upwards and the neatness of the head at the top.

Trust Merlin to leave me speechless.

He's fine, by the way. He brushed the whole thing off with that annoyingly goofy smile of his and a wave of his hand. Apparently he was expecting it to happen one day, it just surprised him that it had happened so soon. I assume by that he means that he is in and out of my chambers at all hours and so by odds alone he would one day have accidentally caught me in the act.

He asked me if it bothered me... and I told him no and laughed it off too. I think I might have punched him in the arm a bit too hard though. That's what being around knights does to you, after all. I keep on forgetting that Merlin is a bit more fragile. He made to stroke his arm when I left the room – I saw it out of the corner of my eye.

Anyway, it's still sort of normal, isn't it? I mean, the knights crack one off all the time when we're out on long hunting trips. I mean, hey, even I've managed it behind some bushes or into a stream before now. All men do it, so it's nothing we should be ashamed of, is it? The knights sometimes catch each other out by mistake, and they've even caught _me_ out accidentally before if they've decided that a certain bush is going to be the "fun fir" but have failed to check for occupation before stepping behind it, but we're all men together, right? There's nothing more to it than sheer bad luck.

But they always make a joke of it and leave promptly. Merlin... didn't.

A quick exit on my behalf was also necessary for another reason. I never realised just how striking he can look in the right light. Not conventionally handsome you understand, but... well... sort of gawkily cute. It... well, it made my groin very hot.

Did I just write that? Really? My head is screwed. I am going to bed before it gets any more addled.

Goodnight.

**9****th**** January – Some Awful Time Before Dawn**

I now know what Merlin's O-face looks like. It's a long story which starts with a deepest-darkness raid on the kitchens. (I'm a virile, strong man with a weakness for cheesy pastry – what can I say?)

On my way down there, barefoot and in my night clothes, I found my attention diverted by a shadow in the moonlight that came streaming in from the corridor's windows. Well, as the leader of the King's Knights, I felt duty-bound to investigate and so, rather narked at being distracted in my most worthy quest for delectable cheesy puffiness, I sneaked over to the window, sword drawn, to see what was casting such a suspicious shadow. (Yes, I do carry my sword when I am in my night clothes. Morgana thinks it's like a stuffed bear replacement, but you can't stab things with a stuffed bear, so she's wrong.)

Who I found, wedged with his back against the stone wall in a nook between a head-high bush and the wall containing the window I looked out of, was Merlin with _his_ sword out. Damn... no wonder my manservant knows how to polish.

Thankfully his eyes were closed, else I would have been spotted straight away. I did think for a moment of knocking on the window and scaring the living daylights out of him, but I didn't have the heart to do so.

Now, being the gentleman that I am and knowing that he has little privacy in Gaius' chambers to do such things, I turned away to ignore it and resume my search for those most delicious dairy delights. I would have done so, had I not heard my name whimpered not two steps from where I had reached.

I turned and silently tip-toed back (what good skills hunting has given me) to find that Merlin had moved onto his back on the ground, his legs raised and his middle finger doing double-time down below. How he managed to relax that quickly, I will never know. It kind of mesmerised me and made me a touch jealous. I can't even manage to pat my head and rub my stomach at the same time and trust me, I have tried my hardest. Merlin, on the other hand, seemed intent on starting a fire judging by the speed with which his hand was whipping up and down. With the amount of oil he was using, I was fully prepared to run for a water bucket at the slightest wisp of smoke.

So you can imagine my surprise when he mouthed my name, thrashed, and promptly put the Grand Fountain in the courtyard to shame. Thankfully, he was also quieter than the same when it is running at full blast. (It's never been the same since Camelot's water supply was temporarily turned to sand a few years ago by a moody sorcerer, Christopher Drummer, who we remember now as "Pissed-off Christoph", but I digress.)

Well, I was quite surprised. I just stared at him dumbly as he shivered and gently massaged his nipples as he came down again. I don't know how long I looked at him, but it was certainly too long for I had to bolt as he opened his eyes.

I hope he gets back to his room without any problems. All I need is for the knights to find him out after curfew and have him hauled before me, knowing what I do.

And I didn't get any cheesy pastries. Damn. Still, there are worse excuses for failing in that quest.

**9****th**** January – Favourite Time (Breakfast)**

He brought me cheesy pastries for breakfast, served with the dumbest grin I have ever seen on anybody in my whole life. Does he know that I saw him? I don't know. His wittering about the brightness of the full moon last night is circumstantial at best. He claims that he saw it through a window and wondered whether I had seen it too.

Well, yes, Merlin, I _had_ actually seen _two_ full moons last night, thank you, but I could hardly tell him that. I settled for saying that it had been fabulously bright and rounded and left it at that. He seemed happy, anyway, right up until I told him about my plan to go hunting tomorrow.

Reality is such a hard thing for him to swallow, I swear it is.

So, I have set him about all of the many tasks that need preparing before such a hunt takes place, including polishing my sword. He seemed to think that his arm ached because he laid on it awkwardly overnight – yes, Merlin, whatever – but nonetheless he's giving it a good buffing as I write this. I didn't let him take it away – I wanted to see his hands at work again. Thank goodness I am sitting down – I don't think I could stand without embarrassment at the moment if I tried. He's just so damned suggestive with those hands.

I have to go. He's almost finished and is questioning why I have spent so long on one paper when normally I get through them as fast as possible.

Goodbye for now.

**9****th**** January – Bed Time**

Damn him! Of all the incompetent, useless, hare-brained... Calm. Be calm. He probably didn't realise what he'd done.

We have no saddle oil. Without it, Merlin can't lubricate the backs of the horses so that they can take a saddle all day and half of the night without it causing them pain from the constant rubbing. I suspect I know precisely how the oil came to be completely used. Merlin stood at my side looking altogether too innocent as I was informed of the situation by the stable master. I swear I saw the front of his breeches twitch as he left.

So, hunting's off for today as the stable master can't make more until tomorrow at the earliest. I don't know if Merlin planned this, but if he did, I shall be very unimpressed. Still, I can't be too mad at him. He did provide me with some good material for use upon my return to my chambers, after all.

Goodnight.

**10****th**** January – The Silent Time**

That owl has been keeping me up for the last four hours. She is now silenced, although quite how I am not sure. She seems to be trying to hoot but no sound is coming from her beak. Actually, the whole place has gone eerily quiet. I don't know why. I am going to investigate.

**10****th**** January – Before Dawn**

Thankfully the silence has not been caused by anything supernatural. I know this because I could still hear Father's snoring from outside of his chambers, so the castle is just unusually quiet tonight. As for the owl, well... she's a mystery.

But it has not been a night without problems. Let me explain.

Since I last wrote in here, I have seen Merlin coming up from the dungeons. There are only two things down there: the cells and the Great Dragon. I don't think Merlin has been visiting the cells, but nor do I know why he would want to visit that glorified handbag. All he ever does is speak in riddles.

Nevertheless, it had been a while since I had last visited him, so I took the opportunity to check that Merlin was out of sight and then took the long, dark staircase for myself.

I have to say, the dragon was as useful as ever. He told me everything and nothing. Apparently I should trust Merlin, although quite why he didn't say. Something about the man having a destiny. I told him that I had no interest in getting wrapped up in it and left. That overgrown lizard looks remarkably pleased about something, but I can't pump Merlin for info as I am not meant to know of the dragon's existence and lizard boy isn't spilling.

I blame Father for me knowing about the G.D.. The things he tells me when he's drunk. *Sigh*.

So now I have a smug lizard and a skulking manservant to keep an eye on. Is my life ever simple?

**10****th**** January – Breakfast**

Well, Merlin has just left to wash my clothes. This should have been at the top of his mind days ago, but it wasn't and so I have been left with no clean trousers. I don't know why he remembered my tunics but not my trousers, but there you have it – this is _Merlin_ after all.

So here I sit, trying to get the smell of dragon smoke out of my nostrils. I would know that smell anywhere, there really is nothing quite like it. The lizard only has to breathe and you get enveloped in it. Merlin, however, seems oblivious to it. I assume this is not his first visit down there this week and he has stopped caring about it.

My problem now comes if he notices it on my nightclothes, which have also gone for a wash. Hopefully he will be blank enough not to.

Now, having finished breakfast, I am writing in my diary with only a tunic on. I also have the creeping suspicion that Merlin has planned this. He looked a little too pleased about his mistake while I was yelling.

Which reminds me: I should send him to fetch me a throat soothing tincture from Gaius. The way this is going, I might have to make it a regular order.

**10****th**** January – Midday**

Merlin has just returned with the news that it is raining outside (as if I don't have windows – that man...) and therefore my clothes are going to take longer to dry due to the damp chill in this place. This has left me in a pickle. I am meant to be attending the throne room for dinner tonight but I can't walk in there with my goods hanging out.

Thankfully (I think), Merlin has come up with a plan. He will fetch my dinner for me under the guise that I am suffering with something horrible and short-lived and therefore cannot possibly present myself today.

In any case, it means I won't have to sit through the speeches. I will just read them later, to catch up.

Merlin himself seems a little breathless today. It's hardly surprising; he's been running around the castle on Gaius' errands as well as my own.

**10****th**** January – Late Evening**

Well, there has now been another mishap. The rain grew so heavy that Merlin's bedroom roof is leaking and it has soaked his bed right through. He told me so when he brought me dinner.

Naturally as I'm not totally unreasonable, I have agreed that he can sleep on the rug by my fire tonight. If the man had a tail, he'd be wagging it, I swear. I do hope leaky roofs do not become a feature of our working relationship. I don't think that I can put up with sharing a room with him every night.

Which brings me onto another worry: Does he snore?

I don't think he would know, but if he's like the knights I won't get a moment's peace all night. On the bright side, at least it would be from the top end. I don't think he's the type to perform the Garderobe Chorus in front of his Prince.

**11****th**** January – At The Owl's First Hoot**

The fire was dying in the grate, Merlin was lying out on his back in front of it and I was half asleep. I had stayed up late to read the speeches from my earlier dinner which I had Merlin fetch for me. My clothes stood on two drying racks; one by Merlin's feet, the other a short distance from the top of his head. I don't know why he didn't think of them earlier, but hey, common sense doesn't seem to figure much in that black-haired head of his.

I haven't got much speech-reading done. Merlin proved to be a distraction, not that he knows it. Once asleep, he becomes so still and calm that I find it fascinating. When his limbs aren't splayed out at all angles, they actually look very well proportioned. I don't think I have ever seen him so still.

Well, that lasted for about half an hour before the turning stated. Once it started, it hardly stopped. Watching him adopt so many positions and at one point nuzzle up to the leg of a pair of my trousers on the rack proved interesting.

If I didn't know better, I would swear he tried to kiss it. At that point, I decided to go to bed myself, snuffed out my reading candle and tucked myself in.

But the strangest thing was that, just as I was drifting off, he mumbled my name. I never knew he dreamed about me too. I could brush it off but for the fact that, when I looked over at him, I discovered that his night clothes had developed a pronounced bulge.

Silhouetted in the dim firelight where here lay, I found it impossible to take my eyes from him. His hand slipped lower and he withdrew himself. Well, I don't get a dry mouth easily, but Merlin, damn him, managed it as he started to stroke himself.

I don't know what made me slip out of bed and go over to him. I think I had the idea of waking him up and reminding him where he was, but as it happened, he saved me the problem. He whispered my name and I replied. His eyes flickered open and... well, I don't have words to describe it. I thought he was going to go mental and flap, but he just smiled at me.

I have never been smiled at like that in my life. It was so tender, so happy and so calm that I just couldn't help leaning down. I must have frozen inches above his face, because Merlin tilted his head and sealed the kiss. And then I couldn't stop. His smile was so inviting that I felt I just had to steal it away from him, but as I continued, it simply grew bigger until I realised that I couldn't.

Now, I'm the first to admit that people cannot put me where I don't want to go, but Merlin eventually just took hold of my shoulders and gently pulled me down until I was laying next to him with his arms around me and his lips ghosting across my jaw. He's remarkably skilled for one so quiet for he barely got a word out of me. I just laid back and let him explore.

I don't know of any other time anybody turned such a fever on me with such little effort. Sorcery could not have achieved it, and I should know (I've been cursed several times in my life, many of which involved fevers).

I learned one huge thing about Merlin then: He's inquisitive. He studied me and learned from his study. What didn't get a reaction didn't happen again. What produced soft gasps were alternated between until he had to push my hands back down to my side and hold them there until I stopped trying to push away the delicious sensations. My mind swam as I realised that he hadn't even gone below shoulder level yet. If a gentle bite on my earlobe made me gasp, I was very worried about lasting any time at all.

But then he stopped, just as my mind began to fog over, and simply stared down at me, playing with my hair.

"Trouble sleeping?", that's what he said to me with a soft chuckle. As if sleep was going to happen then, for Heaven's sake. Only Merlin would create such a perfect moment and then state the bloody obvious.

Well, I had to shut him up, so I shoved his head to one side and planted kisses all over his exposed neck. He was not, after all, going to best me at a game which, I admit proudly, I am something of an expert at.

And then he screamed... right into my ear.

Well, that has never happened to me before and I leapt back wondering what the hell was wrong with him. Apparently he had curled his toes so tightly that his foot had cramped. Needless to say it broke the moment.

I felt quite sorry for him, I have to admit, as he balled up and tried to massage the agony out of the offending limb. His hands are nowhere near strong enough to unknot that tightness. So, after wrestling his foot out of his grasp to massage it, I relieved him of the pain within a few minutes, for which he was goofily grateful but took to gabbling again.

I write these words as he is curled up next to me in my bed, his mouth wide open, his limbs splayed out. I didn't have the heart to leave him on the floor after the experience we had shared, so I am writing this and rubbing a bruise on my leg from where he kicked me as me slept.

He will awaken soon and then we will have a quiet chat. I want to sort a few things out with him before the day begins. Wish me luck.

**11****th**** January – Breakfast**

Breakfast this morning was tongue sandwich, at Merlin's insistence. He provided the tongue whist sandwiching me between himself and the bed. I now have a headache, for which he has gone to fetch a remedy. I shall probably end up chewing on bark before lunch, but it will be worth it. In spite of him accidentally slamming the back of my head into the headboard as I made to change position, it was actually rather pleasant.

I think this is what I want... I think. Since last night, perhaps unsurprisingly, I have come to see Merlin in a different light. Maybe I have been too hard on him. Maybe that's just the blow to my head speaking. I don't know. It turns out he is at least good at kissing, a skill which could take him far. (Maybe even to Royal Advisor status – I hope my Father never reads that. In this diary, I suppose that would be the least of my problems if he ever did.)

He still has a long way to go before that happens, however. (The direction he should take is questionable.)

Well, I had better get on with the business of the day. I have a court session to preside over and then I have to go to training with the knights.

'Bye for now.

**11****th**** January – Lunchtime**

Merlin found me passing judgement in the court. Correction: he found me _trying_ to pass judgement in the court. His arrival quite distracted me, as did the small brown parcel he stuffed into my hands before he left to be elsewhere. I think I got the judgement right. Split the cow between the two men. That's right, isn't it? I'll assume they knew I meant ownership of the beast and that I shall not walk out to the training ground and find cow entrails all over the courtyard. Some people around here can be very literal.

It was bark, by the way – the contents of the parcel. I am chewing on a piece of it now. Thank goodness Gaius knows his cures. One day I hope to be able to drink an infusion of this to cure my headache, but for now I shall have to put up with bits of it getting stuck between my teeth until Gaius can perfect his experiments with the ghastly stuff.

Merlin says that chewing on the bark makes me look cute and thoughtful. He probably means the expression of concentration that I have adopted to avoid the puckered-up one from the bitterness of this cure. That one does not look very dignified. The sooner this headache goes away, the happier I will be.

He's been dashing all over the castle today. Perhaps I should give him a rest... preferably one which involves his lips and mine. I don't think he will object. He's been giving me goofy grins every time we've passed one another today.

Perhaps I should stay out of his way for the rest of the day though. The last time he saw me through the court window, he promptly walked straight into a stone pillar. He seemed alright. Gwen tended to him before I could free myself from the proceedings to go and see to him. I'll make sure once I have worn out the knights.

Speaking of which, I have an assemblage of muscle to go and train. How hard my life is... *wink*.

'Bye for now.

**11****th**** January – Early Evening**

They know something is going on. Percival noted the bruise on the back of my neck and Gwaine caught a flash of the bruise on my shoulder. Damn it! I didn't know that Merlin had created those. I shall have to chat to him about his enthusiasm.

They also noticed my good mood. I think they like it. Certainly I was not in the mood to work them as hard as I usually do. They're now off guy-bonding. As this usually involves alcohol and test-fights and I have left them to it. Usually I find their company fun, but right now I am curious about what Merlin is doing.

**11****th**** January – Dinner Time**

I couldn't find Merlin. He seems to have vanished off the face of the world. He probably has his breeches down somewhere. If I didn't know what I do about him, I would never have thought it of him. As I say, I don't care as long he doesn't get caught again.

Dinner was served by Gwen. She's lovely, you know. It's a pity that she's Morgana's servant, else I would quite happily pair her with Merlin for myself. She could teach him how to do the job I employ him for, for example. She doesn't know where he has vanished to either.

Strange. I shall just have to wait for him, I suppose.

**11****th**** January – Late Evening**

Damn! I have just returned from Gaius' chambers. Merlin is flat out on his back, running a fever and gabbling incomprehensibly. It's just like last night, except that he didn't have a fever then. I have to go and fetch a rare morteus flower without which he will expire.

Do I sound uncaring here? I'm not, it's just that I'm scribbling this as fast as I can while my horse is being prepared.

Note to self: I must speak to that bloody lizard. Merlin stank of dragon smoke again.

**12****th**** January – Midnight-ish**

Spiders: Giant, leggy, toothy bastards! Trust Merlin to have been affected by a poison that can only be cured with a rare flower which only grows in one single cave. He is on the mend, by the way. He's sweaty, certainly, but recovering. Thank the Lord he didn't gabble about last night and limited his comments to "Faster, Arthur, faster." I can at least re-interpret that for the others.

I have had a bath. It's amazing how smelly caves can make you, especially when you have to climb a sheer cliff whilst being chased by a hoard of overgrown fanged fiends. All I shall say here is that sweaty doesn't begin to cover it. I shall call in my stylist in a moment. It is an emergency, after all. I will never get the tangles out of my hair without her.

So that's yet another bill I shall have to explain to Father.

I have just come back here to update this, get re-styled and collect some personal effects and then I shall be heading back down to Gaius' chambers until Merlin comes to.

Goodnight.

**12****th**** January – The Early Hours**

Merlin is awake again and has been muttering something about glowing orbs. I think a fairy has invaded his brain, to be honest, but Gaius assures me he's normal. I suppose spouting incomprehensible gibberish is normal for Merlin, so I've bowed to my physician's judgement.

The dawn is breaking outside and I am sitting by Merlin's bedside, trying to keep him in it now that it has fully dried out. (It happened so fast it was like magic. I know better though. Sorcerers don't waste their magic on household chores, so it could not have been magic.) Merlin keeps on wanting to check my room. I have told him that the knights are searching the castle for any poisoned items, including my chambers. He doesn't want to accept it, but I've allowed him to curl up against me in a bit of a funk and firmly made it clear that it's not his choice. Closeness seems to work on him and he's barely keeping his eyes open as I write this. I swear he thinks that something's going to happen. That's what comes of listening to the opinionated brazier downstairs. He _always_ thinks that something's about to happen. It's enough to make you paranoid.

Talking of which, as soon as Merlin is calm enough to be left alone I will be having words with Scaly Boy. I want to know what he's been filling Merlin's head with.

Merlin's toying with the back of my hair again and it's getting quite ticklish, so I had better stop writing to give him some attention before he decides to try and plait it out of boredom. I can only disguise this diary for so long. At the moment he believes that it's a financial account ledger, but that's only because he can't quite see clearly yet.

'Bye for now.

**12****th**** January – Lunchtime**

Big, fat, hairy bollocks! That glorified bonfire on legs has really complicated things this time! Merlin thinks that it's his destiny to help me become a great King. No wonder he has been so on edge. Why does he think that? Because lizard-lips told him so.

To cap that off, Dragon-dearest warned him of a plot to poison me, which Merlin went to try to stop. He drank from a wine goblet to check it before it was served to me and received a nasty dose of the stuff. No wonder he's in such a state! I have told the overgrown flamethrower that if he finds out about any more dangers to my life, he is to tell me, not my manservant. For goodness' sake!

Anyway, I now stink of dragon smoke again, so I need yet another wash. At this rate, I shall have to double my order of bath oils. Once I have done that, I shall need to go and check that Merlin's still alright. Gwen told me a moment ago that he was seen walking around carrying one of Morgana's dresses earlier. I think he's still addled, but this I just have to see for myself. I shall also need to dress him down for leaving his bed when I explicitly told him to rest today.

**12****th**** January – Bed Time**

Merlin is very firmly sleeping with me tonight. I need to keep an eye on him. I did indeed manage to find him carrying one of Morgana's dresses. He told me that he was simply going to wash it for her as Gwen is so busy. Personally I don't think it needed washing, but who am I to contradict my personal washer?

Plus it seems that he can get stains out of everything just as well as he can get them into them. It's just as well, really...

In spite of dressing him down, he seems lucid enough to argue with me about how desperately I seemed to want to keep him in bed, so I let it go in the end. Merlin being argumentative just shows that he has almost fully recovered from his escapade. It was either back down or have the whole castle hear at full volume that I want him back in bed now, and I'm just not ready to do that right now.

In other news, an intruder was caught infiltrating the castle earlier. She has disappeared from the dungeons and so far is nowhere to be seen. Presumably she left in disguise as Merlin said he found the dress not far from where she vanished.

It's a bit strange that anybody would infiltrate us and only steal one of Morgana's less flashy dresses, but I suppose it takes all sorts to run the Kingdom, even dress-stealers. When I told Merlin that it was him and he just loved the colour of Morgana's outfit so much that he just _had_ to try it on and go for a stroll, he became even more garbled than he usually is. He genuinely thought that I believe he has a dress fetish and would sneak about in public wearing one. He's an odd man. I left him babbling out a thousand-and-one reasons why the escapee could not have been him whilst I got as far away as I could and promptly laughed my lungs up.

Sometimes he's so oblivious to my moods it's incredible. I was only teasing him, in spite of my straight face and level delivery.

The sound of thunder that you can hear in the background is the handbag's laughter, in case you were wondering. I don't know what he's so amused about and I don't really care. I will have to throw a boot at him and tell him to shut up if he keeps it up much longer though. It's very hard to work out what the hell's been happening with that racket going on.

Anyway, Merlin should be here soon, so I shall fluff up the pillows and make ready for him. I want him to be calm and sleep well tonight, after all. He's been through a lot today.

**13****th**** January – Lunchtime**

Every night brings something new recently, it seems. Last night I learned that Merlin is an utterly incurable snuggler. It took him a grand total of a minute from entering the room to curling up against me. Seriously, he didn't even change for bed, he just took off his shoes and then hopped straight into bed as if it was his and hugged up to me.

Now don't misunderstand me: I'm not exactly complaining, but at the very least taking his top off would have been a bonus. I removed it in the end. It had a lingering whiff of dragon on it and there is _no way_ that I am sleeping with that smell hanging around. Not after I have taken such pains to keep myself dragon-whiff-free, anyway.

He didn't stay awake for long. Actually he fell asleep on my chest while I was asking him about how his day had been. (I'm not involved in it _all_ after all.) It was all I could do to tuck him in next to me and try to get to sleep myself before his turning began in earnest.

Actually, he wasn't too bad last night. I don't know if having my arm around his waist and his head buried under my chin soothed him or the fact that I didn't object, having turned on my side and dislodging him, to having his bottom pressed firmly to my hip. He must have felt my arousal for he murmured happily and drew it around in a slow circle once or twice. It was almost as if he was getting comfortable again with it pressed against him.

What it didn't seem to do was wake him up, at least not completely.

Then the sun was shining and I awoke to him leaning on my chest and staring down at me with his fingers playing across my cheek and chin. And a kiss. Oh, God, and _the_ kiss. The one to end them all. The one that awakens slumbering princesses. _That_ kiss. I'm pretty sure that any Prince Charming has never grinned so brightly as he did after that. (Wait, isn't that _my_ job? Damn! He's beaten me again. _And_ he's made me a princess in the process. Oh God! Identity crisis looming!)

Well, unlike many princesses, I knew precisely what to do next. (Heh-heh.) Never has a manservant groaned so loudly in the history of the world. Without being too candid, let's say that Merlin found out precisely what other uses my well-spoken tongue can be put to. He has just left me... I say just because he's so addled after meeting the maestro that I'm surprised there aren't any bluebirds whirling around his head. (Why do people say that happens when people are confused? I'd find them flipping annoying to say the least. People are strange.)

As for me, well, I have to find some mouth wash before I address council this afternoon. He has almost stuck my jaws together and my throat is annoyingly sticky. See you later.

**13****th**** January – Early Evening**

Well, he is certainly a surprise. I left council more than a little irritated thanks to Father's renewed complaints about my styling bill and the first person I bumped into was Merlin. Actually, bumped into is right. I may not have been paying attention as I swept down the hall, scattering people as I went. I can't help it if he wasn't quick enough to get out of the way.

Actually, I really didn't notice him and almost knocked him flat. He sprawled, but I managed to catch him and, with a deft side-step (thanks to my dancing skills, naturally), managed to spin us both into an empty room before most people knew what was happening. He was alright, I checked.

Once he realised what had happened, he couldn't help laughing at my red cheeks. I was not in the best of moods, after all. Father wants to replace my stylist with a cheaper one which is, frankly, a disaster. I think I've put it off for now, but I have to be careful only to see her every other week now.

Apparently red cheeks and blond hair don't go well together. I was about to throw a best tirade at him when he pushed me against the wall, pulled down my trousers and swallowed me. Now, I have heard of the novel ways in which manservants avoid their master's bad moods, but this has got to be one of the most surprising. I can't say it was very comfortable at first, having the shout on my lips being contradicted by a deadly-accurate tongue, but eventually one of them won. Or both. I don't quite know. I think the shout escaped just as he tipped me over and I lost both at once.

Then he wiped his cheek dry, turned and walked out, pausing only to give me the smuggest grin ever, even by his usual standards.

I am now in my chambers, writing the event down in the hope that it will help to clear my mind. What does it all _mean_?

The rumbling has started again. Damned dragon. I wish he would not be so loud. God knows what he's laughing about this time.

**13****th**** January – Bed Time**

Merlin has arrived and is chilling in the bath I have made him take before he comes to bed. Once again, he stinks of dragon smoke. I could be pissed about that, but it at least gave me a chance to admire his lithe frame as he lowered himself into the water. Finally the cackling candle-lighter has provided a useful contribution to my life. I'm not sure he likes my bath oil though... Merlin, I mean. I would be worried if the irritating igniter had a preference for how I smell. I might have to sound Merlin out on which one he would prefer for himself. If he's to become a regular fixture in here, he needs to come to bed smelling good and not like baked brimstone.

**14****th**** January – Midnight**

Revenge is sweet. Merlin is presently wincing as his throat is sore from the force of the cries he has had to stifle with my pillow. He's wearing the hugest grin yet though as he bathes by the fire and looks so relaxed as I update this. That's what he gets for deliberately rubbing his bottom against my hips whilst in an arm lock. He seems to want to have a re-match sometime though if that blown kiss is anything to go by.

Now, off to bed. He has the wet patch. Heh-heh. I did all the work, after all. If he can walk comfortably in the morning, I will be very surprised.

Goodnight.

**14****th**** January – Late Evening**

Woo-hoo! I win! Merlin has been in the saddle on our hunting trip all day and has been complaining of various aches. Partly this was due to me pinning him to the bed to stop him from thrashing off of it last night and partly it's because I'm a big boy now.

All he has caught is a long length of rope which we use for the snares. Still, he has a twinkle in his eye which says that he's enjoyed himself, even if he is covered in lake mud. (He fell in after a rabbit burst from a bush and scared him.)

**15****th**** January – Breakfast**

Alright, I have learned a new lesson: Merlin is good at knots and blindfolds and my bottom aches. He bound me to the bed last night with the hunting rope and took his revenge. For _hours_. He seemed to be humming to himself for most of it. When I gasped the question of which tune it was, he replied that he didn't know but that he was going to name it something to with his Prince coming one day. Then he nibbled my ear and my mind fell apart.

How I am meant to think of a retort to that when he has his hands oiled up and is working his Prince as hard he can without letting him tip over the edge? Bitch.

It's a strange thing though: I don't remember him physically tying the knots which bound me. I must have been so surprised at the blindfold and he must have done it so quickly that I didn't have time to process it. My life with him in it gets weirder.

Still, in spite of that, it was a delicious experience. Nobody has ever dared to do that to me before. Perhaps he does have potential after all. At the moment I have sent him to do the extra washing that his revenge has caused him. Does that mean I win? Heh-heh.

**16****th**** January – Dinner Time**

My horse is the wrong colour. Did you know that? My beautiful brown stallion is the wrong colour. Such is the wisdom which pours out of Merlin's mouth. And do you know what colour he thinks it should be? No? Pure... white.

How _girly_.

How am I meant to hunt anything in the woods if my horse sticks out like a sore thumb? Such is Merlin's inane babbling when he gets fed up with hunting. It starts just as we leave the castle and doesn't stop until we return.

He even commented that he was surprised I could ride for so long without my bottom getting sore. There was a cheeky glint in his eye which the knights missed but I could not fail to. Coupled with comments about how much saddle oil I must have used on my last trip to explain the sudden shortfall (yes, I admit, that was our fault), he kept the suggestiveness up without the knights suspecting a thing for the whole of the ride home.

He even had the audacity to offer to show me how to ride a prize stallion. It amused the knights considerably and left me with red cheeks after he winked at me whist wearing that oh-so-innocent grin of his.

Innocent, my arse! That man could put the town harlots to shame on their own turf and still come away smelling of roses.

Tonight I will remind him of who he is dealing with.

**17****th**** January – Breakfast**

Merlin is exhausted and is curled up asleep next to me in bed whilst I write this. The circular bruises all over his back and shoulders – my hallmark – will remind him who is in control in this relationship. He is _my_ manservant and that means that by law I can do what I wish to him. His nail marks in my bed posts prove it.

He's completely wiped out. Seven climaxes in as many hours would do that to anybody. I tried him for an eighth, but didn't manage to get anything more out. His body, it seems, has thwarted my plan to take him to ten.

I don't think he disliked it, although he was having trouble staying awake for the last few. I doubt that he will be making any more remarks about my riding skills any time soon. I have left him in no doubt about them.

He is also remarkably flexible. He actually managed to get his heels comfortably behind his own neck and stay like that for a whole ten minutes before having to release them. Secretly, I'm impressed.

Right, I'm off to see Father about treaties. I don't think Merlin will be waking up any time soon.

'Bye for now.

**17****th**** January – Dinner Time**

I write this as I await Merlin's return with my dinner. Father kept me in council all day and so I haven't seen my manservant at all since this morning. Gaius tells me that he's been unusually tired and calm today, but that when he asked him for a handful of lavender, he received a toadstool from my hapless, hot helper.

Only Merlin...

Meanwhile, I have received a report from the stables that somebody has increased the weekly order for saddle oil and charged it to my account. I can take a pretty good guess who... Cheeky man. I'll let it slide for now though... I think I will be needing it if things carry on like this.

Meanwhile, the scaly sage downstairs has been deeply amused by something. His rumbling laughter has been echoing up from the dungeons on and off all day. Honestly, for being imprisoned he seems remarkably pleased.

I hear footsteps. It's Merlin. 'Bye.

**17****th**** January – Just Before Bed**

Merlin is once again red-cheeked. When he arrived in my chambers, he handed me a single red rose which he said Gwen had asked him to give to me. I don't think he realised that it was not meant to be from her, but from him.

My suspicions were confirmed when Morgana smirked at me in passing on the way to council. She and Gwen obviously planned it, for she has been smiling at me approvingly all day.

I received the gift well, considering that was a huge surprise, and it's presently sitting in a small vase on my desk so that I can look at it whilst I write this. The thing is, Merlin doesn't seem to have worked out Morgana's plot. He is just being shy and grinning a lot.

The sex I can handle in our life. To be honest, I'm sort of getting used to it and yes, I admit, I am enjoying it. Does Merlin want to take things further now? I don't know. He mumbled something about the rose being for me and then left without saying anything else. He didn't even give me the chance to thank him.

I think he was worried about how I would react. The man must have balls of steel to be daring enough to present me with it. I don't know of anybody else who would.

I need to think carefully about this one. It's not just my life that could be screwed up by the wrong choice. I need to think of what is best for the Kingdom as well.

Goodnight...

**18****th**** January – Late Morning**

Merlin is glowing today. He spotted the rose on my desk when he came in to wake me and has not stopped grinning since. At least I can still keep somebody happy. Father is annoyed once more, this time because all of his hair has fallen out. Naturally, sorcery is to blame.

So, I'm staying out of his way for now. I can hardly look at him without laughing, so it's probably for the best.

Gwen has been giving me questioning looks all day so far. I think she's hinting in her subtle way that I should have given Merlin a gift in return by now. I would have done, but to be honest I can't think what I should give him. If it's too flashy, he'll never take it. If it isn't at least a bit flashy I'll be accused of being cheap, considering my wealth and status and all.

I also need it to be fairly subtle, so that Father won't suspect too much. I don't want him finding out about Merlin and I yet. At least, not until his temper settles a bit first.

The Brazen Brazier downstairs has started laughing again. I wonder if Merlin would like a dragon-skin wallet...

**18****th**** January – Just After Midnight**

Alright, I now know that it's official. Merlin has started to affect my judgement.

The first snows arrived this afternoon and we are already buried knee-deep in the stuff. The castle is freezing but Merlin is thrilled. I can tell, because he has become more exasperating than usual.

Why do I say that? Because he decided to ban me from sex until I sneaked out of the castle with him after curfew to make snow angels. Yes, you did read that right. Merlin wanted to break curfew to make snow angels and wanted to use me, the Crown Prince, as his cover.

Only Merlin...

Well, I can't be sexless. I have had enough of that to cast myself willingly back into that life again. So, what choice did I have? If I wanted Merlin's body (which I certainly do), I had to obey.

So, out we crept, via the castle roof and some ivy to creep through the town and into the fields beyond. Actually, it was a little fiddly to leave for, you see, we had to hide out of sight of Morgana and Gwen who were climbing up the ivy at the same time we wanted to go down. Who would have thought it? My perfect sister breaking curfew with her maid. I must remember to mention it to her tomorrow. I'm sure I won't enjoy it in the slightest, but these things must be done...

Anyway, when we reached the fields, we found several Morgana-shaped snow angels already present in all of the best spots. So we had no choice but to make our way into the forest and find a clearing.

Well, all I can say is that it was fun. Seeing Merlin frolic in the snow made my heart soar and the snowball fight which we had was excellent. It was a shame when it was all over.

Getting back into the castle was also tricky, for when we arrived we had to hide again to avoid being seen by Father who was also using the Ivy Road. It seems that even he wanted to go out and make snow angels. (I know – we followed him).

So now Merlin is asleep beside me as we warm up in front of the fire.

I've often felt that there was something missing in my life and perhaps I now know what it is. I have really enjoyed tonight. Perhaps I should ask him... Well, it can't hurt...

Goodnight.

**19****th**** January – Late Morning**

Wheeeeee! Merlin said yes! He is now officially my lover.

Actually, he decided last night that he wanted to ask me but didn't know how to.

Father is not amused, but I've made it clear that he can't punish Merlin as I asked him. I left him grumbling in the throne room.

Morgana wanted to know how long it would be before she became an auntie. Hah-hah. I told her it wouldn't happen until I saw more snow angels, which seemed to silence her for a time.

Gwen is being her sappy self. If she could throw rose petals at us I swear she would. Knowing her, I think she'll start planning the wedding for tonight.

Oh, and Merlin is a sorcerer. Apparently I should have guessed. I don't quite know what to think, but if accepting that means accepting that I'll get laid and I will keep him, then that's fine with me.

Also, he says that the Great Dragon is delighted. It seems that I should thank the scaly salamander. Merlin seems to have acted according to his instructions.

Does that mean that the Great Dragon also likes making snow angels? I don't know and I don't think that I want to. I'm glad I asked Merlin before he got it into his head that Merlin should put me in the same chains that he's in.

So, I don't really think I need to keep this diary any more. It's served its purpose. I shall now have it sealed and placed into the castle archives. I doubt that it will ever be found and read by anybody there.

Goodbye.

Your besotted Prince Arthur.


End file.
